Leaders: Don’t quit when you are tired. Here is when you can quit…

Summary: Many leaders are tired now. Fatigued. This article is for you: Don’t quit when you are tired…quit when you are done.

Recently, my oldest son and I competed in a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu (BJJ) tournament together.

It was a highlight experience. Being only our second tournament, we both felt uncertain going in.

He did fantastically. He worked hard and won four out of five matches to earn second place.

100% proud daddy.

BJJ tournaments are intense. If you aren’t familiar with the sport, it’s a lot of what you see in MMA or UFC — minus the punching and kicking.

But no breaks. It’s one, long, round.

From my own experience, it’s intimidating, exhausting, exhilarating and even more exhausting. The coach can scream direction. But it’s easy to reach a point where you feel you can’t go further.

You’re tired and your body won’t respond. “A little bit more” won’t cut it. Your opponent might have you tied up. You hurt. You can’t breathe. It needs to be a lot more and right now.

You feel like you are losing anyway. You want it to be over.

And then you dig in deep. Push past any and all feelings. And make it happen.

The next day, I asked my son what he learned during the tournament.

He said, “I learned not to give up when I felt tired. But I kept going until I was done.”

He’s only nine years old.

200% proud daddy.

Don’t give up. Don’t give in.

The last two years have been tough for a lot of organizations. Grueling for many leaders. Even in companies that have had great years.

Many Leaders Feel Tired

Tired of navigating an unpredictable landscape. Tired of the unyielding, ambient stress. Tired of not finding employees. Tired of pushing hard only to end up in another tough situation. Tired of figuring out how to thread the needle with safety, masks, vaccines, and mandates.

Tired of feeling…

…uncertain.

…confused.

…uncomfortable.

…doubtful.

…overwhelmed.

Many leaders gave up last year. They might still be “on the job.” But they were no longer putting in the fight. They hunkered down, hoping everything would blow over and past them. It was a poor strategy. Their organizations suffered.

Others put in the fight. Many did well. But the fatigue is showing up. Some are burning out.

A few fantasize about giving up. Others don’t have the energy where it matters. Many have less bandwidth to deal with the “people stuff” of leadership (which is most of leadership).

The actual work in front of them is challenging but not impossible.

But mentally…as human beings…they are taking a beating.

Your Biggest Opponent Is You

I was beaten twice in my first (and only other) tournament.

I did not have fun. I felt demoralized. I didn’t want to do that again.

Gratefully, an ex-special operator talked to me. He said he felt the same after his early tournaments. This surprised me.

Guys like him define tough.

He said it took him three to four tournaments to win the mental game. He didn’t talk about winning or losing matches. He talked about winning the internal battle.

He recommended that I give it at least that many tries. And to fight the internal battle.

I’m so grateful for that advice.

This time, I didn’t worry about my opponent. I focused on myself. My own attitude and mindset.

I had a great tournament and a lot of fun. It was hard. But I found a side of myself that I didn’t know was there.

Let the Challenge Change You

Facing intense challenges changes you. Somebody different emerges on the other side.

That’s why I’m so glad my son chose to compete. Win or lose, he faced something most people won’t attempt. And he pushed through to the end. He came out different.

You don’t need martial arts to find a challenge. Life provides plenty of opportunities.

Choose Discomfort

The ability to pursue a goal, regardless of how it feels, sets successful people apart.

Your people need to see this. They need this from you.

You can’t quit when there is conflict. You can quit when the conflict is resolved.

You can’t quit when there is confusion. You can quit when clarity has been established.

You can’t quit when there is change. You can quit when you’ve completed the process.

You can’t quit when there is fear or uncertainty. You can quit when your team is confident again.

Dig down deep and make yourself show up again. Do the right thing again, with the right attitude again. Lead your people.

The good news is the battle might be long, but it doesn’t last forever.

Be Prepared: Win the Battle Before It Starts

Many motivated leaders push too hard all of the time. Too many hours. Too many direct reports. Too many nights away from home. Too much all at once.

When it matters, they are already gassed out.

The highest-performing leaders don’t do this. They know when to bring it all to the mat. They know when to rest and recover. They know how to maintain margin in between.

How you manage yourself before a challenge matters at least as much as how you tackle the challenge.

Giving it your all doesn’t mean redlining. It means always being prepared.

You Chose This

It’s not fair. But at some point, you put up your hand and said, “Yes, I’ll lead.”

Now is when that matters.

Push through the discomfort.

As the old saying goes, “Be willing to do what no one else will so that you (and your team) can experience what no one else can.”

Take good care,

Christian

Originally published at https://www.christianmuntean.com on November 16, 2021.